


Not a Last, but a First

by februarystars26



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Ben lives, F/M, Fix-It, I had to I just had to, Post Episode IX, Post Episode IX fic, Post tros fic, Post-Canon Fix-It, Soft kissing, death? I don't know her, not reinventing the wheel just changing the ending, retconning the retcon
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-21
Updated: 2019-12-21
Packaged: 2021-02-25 23:08:01
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,381
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21883492
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/februarystars26/pseuds/februarystars26
Summary: ***IX SPOILERS***A fic in which Ben lives because he deserves it, and I give Rey and Ben the happy ending that was stolen from them on a familiar little planet that ISN'T Tatooine because why would anyone chose to live there? I hope you enjoy and that it soothes some wounds??
Relationships: Kylo Ren/Rey, Rey & Ben Solo | Kylo Ren, Rey/Ben Solo | Kylo Ren
Comments: 11
Kudos: 218





	Not a Last, but a First

**Author's Note:**

> god damn I love Ben Solo so much. 
> 
> Ok, enjoy maybe, hopefully
> 
> Nice little short fic with a happy ending, though. What's not to love?

“Ben,” she said softly. 

“Ben please,” she plead with his corpse. Tears were starting to track down her face. She was clutching his hands on his chest. 

She felt like a part of her was dying as he did, felt like she was slipping away with him. And… that is when it all came crashing back to her. That is when she remembered who he was. What he was to her. 

He was Ben Solo, the last Skywalker, the love of her life, her dyad in the force. 

They were one. The force bound them together as it always had and as it always will. Right now, he was dead, but their bond could never be. 

If she would live… so would he. All she had to do was pull. 

She closed her eyes and reached into the part of herself she knew was always bound to him, and she pulled, willing him back to her. And then she opened her eyes. 

He hadn’t moved. 

She sobbed. She fell forward onto her chest and grabbed fistfuls of his shirt. 

“You were supposed to be here with me,” she cried. “That wasn’t a last kiss. It was a first.” 

And through deep, shaking breaths, finally, “You told me I wasn’t alone.” 

“You’re not,” came his voice. She choked out another sob. It was unfair, how quickly he had faded into just a voice in her head. 

“Rey,” his voice spoke again, and then his arms came up around her back, holding her. She picked up her head off his chest so quickly to... to find his open eyes staring back at her. 

She was stunned. She couldn’t move, couldn’t even form a sentence. “You- You-”

“Are alive,” he said. He put a hand on her face, “Because of you.” 

Tears of a different nature fell down her face now. She felt like the sun was going to shine out of her chest. “But I’m only alive because of you,” she pointed out.

He leaned up and pressed a kiss to her lips, “I’ll call us even then.” 

She smiled and leaned in, desperate to kiss him again. 

He put a hand on her shoulder to stop her, “As badly as I want to kiss you again,” he said, “and please believe me, there is nothing I want more, we need to get off this planet and to a med bay, both of us.” 

She knew he was right. “Can you walk?” He looked down at his legs, one of which was still badly bent out of shape. He shook his head. 

“Ok,” she said. “I need to comm someone from my ship, just wait here.” His eyes said it all. He didn’t want her to leave him again. “I promise I’ll be right back.” She squeezed his hand. “We’re walking out of this together.”

She went as quickly as she could to the x wing, which wasn’t really all that quickly considering her physical state, and sent out a distress call. There was a ship descending for them almost immediately, and she wasn’t surprised to see it was the familiar shape of the falcon.

Finn came down the ramp first, flinging himself into her arms. 

“You’re ok,” he said, his relief evident. 

“I am,” she replied. 

“Come on,” he encouraged her as he pulled his arm toward the ship. “Let’s get out of here.”

She didn’t move, shaking her head. “Actually, I need your help.” Finn gave her a puzzled look. “There’s someone else.” 

\--

Convincing Finn to help Ben was harder than the half drag, half walk they had to do to get him back to the Falcon. Finn was really only convinced by the fact that Ben had been dead a few minutes ago, and that had to be atonement enough for his sins. 

Chewie opened the doors once they got back to the falcon, roaring in fury when he saw Ben was propped up between them. 

Ben noticeably winced, “I know,” he started. “I’m sorry Chewie, I am.” 

There was a moment more when Chewie still looked like he might truly kill him, and then his expression softened, and he placed a paw on Ben’s hair. 

Rey felt like she could finally take a deep breath. She and Chewie got him back to the med bay. 

Finn watched as she and Ben stabilized his leg, and put a breathing mask on him for good measure. When she was finished, she went to move past Finn.

“I should go see if Chewie and Lando need help,” she said. Finn grabbed at her arm before she could leave the room. 

“Rey,” he said, sounding confused. “What are you talking about? You’re bleeding, you need to be treated, too.” 

“What?” Rey asked, genuinely confused. She raised her hand to her forehead to find blood there. “Oh,” she said, and then it was like the weight of the last few hours crashed down on her. She sat down ungracefully on the floor. 

“Rey,” Finn said worriedly. Ben, too, seemed concerned, immediately ripping off his breathing mask and turning toward her. 

“She’s alright,” came Jannah’s voice from the other side of the room. “She’s just in a little bit of shock. Finn go help Chewie.” He hesitantly moved out of the room as Jannah leaned down and used a towel to clear some of the muck and blood off of Rey. 

Jannah was gentle as she helped Rey to her feet. She looked at Ben who was still sitting up. 

She nodded at Rey and then to him, “She needs to sleep it off.” Ben seemed to catch a meaning that Rey couldn’t quite, and then Ben moved on the bed to make room for her, and Jannah set her down next to him. 

It was tight, but it was worth it. Jannah slipped a breathing mask around her and dimmed the room lights before leaving. 

Rey set her head down on Ben’s chest, feeling calmer knowing he was here, and he was ok. They both were. He put his arms around her, as he had when she’d kissed him. She fell asleep in a blink. 

\--

The knowledge that the former Supreme Leader was on base was on a strictly need to know basis. He didn’t even get off the falcon until hours after the revelry had stopped, and when he did it was really just to get fresh clothes and to clean up a bit. He smelled like dust. 

They met with Poe and Finn, briefly, as they were the generals now, to explain what happened, and make a case for Ben’s name to be cleared. 

Poe was more understanding than Rey had expected. He just nodded at Ben and then said, “Leia would’ve taken you back, cleared your record, so we will.” 

Rey’s heart sank and soared at the same time. She wished Leia had been here. 

Poe cleared his throat, “But all that said, I have to be honest. I think you need to lay low for a while, until the dust settles. Both of you.” Rey took Ben’s hand. She knew he was right. She didn’t know if they still had enemies just yet, or where they were. It was safer for them both. 

“You can take any small craft in the fleet, I assume you want the falcon,” Poe said. 

To Rey’s surprise, Ben shook his head. “That ship belongs to Chewie, we’ll take a smaller vessel.” 

Finn looked at them then, “Do you have somewhere to go?”

“I know a place,” Ben said, a faint smile coming to his lips as he looked at Rey. 

\--

A few hours later, they were packed and ready to leave. They were trying to get out without drawing much attention to themselves. 

Finn came up to her as she was loading gear (and D-O) into their ship. 

He looked her deep in the eye, and pulled her in for a hug. “Are you sure about him?” He asked quietly.

Rey nodded. “He’s my other half. My balance in the force,” she replied.

Finn didn’t look completely sold, but he did look more convinced than before. “By the way,” he said. “We need to talk about all that some time.” Rey smiled at him, and then Ben was beside her, his hand coming to rest on her back. 

“It’s not goodbye forever,” she told him. 

“It never is.” 

“You’ll visit?” she asked Finn. 

“Of course,” he reassured her. “You’re family.” She felt such peace as he walked away from her. She looked up at Ben. It was still hard to believe what she saw when she looked at him. His face with no scar, his body clad in a black shirt and loose jacket with dark green Resistance issue pants. 

“Are you ready?” she asked him. 

He nodded and let her lead the way onto their ship. 

\--

She still hadn’t really asked where they were going. She trusted him enough to take them somewhere safe. 

She dozed happily in the co-pilot seat while he flew and occasionally reached over and brushed a hand down her cheek. One of the benefits of taking a small ship. 

She woke up when he dropped out of hyperspace and she couldn’t contain her delight at the blue-green planet laid out before her eyes. 

“Oh, Ben,” she said softly, and pulled his lips to hers chastly. She looked into his eyes, and she knew her hope, her love for him, was written all over her face. 

Their comm transmitted static, and then a voice came through. “Naboo air command, ID number for landing requested.” 

She saw him take a deep breath. “No ID number, I’m sorry. But this is Ben Solo, son of Leia Organa. I am the last descendant of your former Queen, Padme Amidala. I’m requesting the diplomatic immunity of the Naeberrie family on Naboo be invoked, and asking permission to land.” 

Rey looked at him. It seemed like he was using words he used long ago, words he hadn’t uttered in years. 

The was quiet on the other end of the line, and then after what felt like a long pause, “You’re clear to land… and welcome home your grace.” 

They touched down on the flight deck, and disembarked, exchanging a few words with the security detail there. Well, Ben did most of the talking, Rey was just walking about, a bit dumbstruck. This was, by far, the most beautiful planet she had ever seen in her life, and she had barely even seen it yet. 

With every passing mile in the speeder with Ben, though, she was more and more sure she was right. 

But she was sure she had never seen anything so beautiful as the house they stopped at. The house on the lake. 

Ben came around and helped her out of the speeder. “Where-” she tried. 

“My grandmother’s estate,” he said, “then it was my mother’s, now it’s ours.” She held his hand as he led her up the steps onto a veranda overlooking to water. 

“Have you been here before?” Rey asked. 

He shook his head. “She always said she’d take me, but we never came. She made sure I knew how to get here, though, like she knew I would make it here one way or another.” Rey leaned into him, wrapping her arms around his waist. 

Three people came rushing around the corner of the house, then. At the center was a very, very old female creature. 

“What is the meaning of this?” she was shouting. “I am the caretaker of this estate and I will not have-” She paused and sucked in a breath when she and Ben turned around. The caretaker held her hand to her mouth and shook her head, “I’m sorry, you’ll have to forgive the outburst, and you- you just, oh,” she took a breath, “you look so much like her.” 

Ben furrowed his brow, “My mother?” 

“Your grandmother,” she said with misty eyes. “What is your name, dear boy, I doubt you’re using Amidala.” 

Ben smiled, “Ben, Ben Solo.” Rey felt her heart beat wildly. It was the first time she’d ever heard him say his name, his true name. 

“Master Solo, welcome home.” She turned to Rey then. 

“And you, mistress? Your name?” she asked. 

“Rey,” she replied. 

The servants looked at each other, and the caretaker spoke again, “A family name, ma’am, would be more appropriate.” 

She looked up at Ben. He offered her a small smile and a shrug. She turned back to the servants. “Just Rey, if you don’t mind.” 

Ben slipped his hand into hers and pulled them off into the house. 

\--

It was sunset when she left her room again, properly clean and comfortable now. She had been offered any of the clothes in the house, and had only chosen a simple shirt and pants, but she had added the deep blue, long, silk shirt that touched the ground when she walked over her clothes. It was too beautiful to ignore. She had let her hair down as well. She didn’t think she would be running into battle any time soon. 

She found Ben on the porch overlooking the water. He was wearing soft black clothing, the same variety he’d been wearing when he came to her on Exogol. He looked much better now though, of course. His hair was clean and some of his curls were even falling back into place. The color had returned to his face and his wounds were healing. 

She took her place at his side when she reached him. He looked down at her so sweetly, and leaned down to properly kiss her as the sun set before them. His mouth molded to hers, tying the two of them together, infinitely. The kiss felt like a promise. Of all the life they had to live, of all the adventures that were starting here at this spot. 

He finally broke away from her, and they both needed to take deep breaths.

“I love you,” he said, his mouth just an inch or two from her own, his eyes boring into hers. “I need you to know.”

“I love you, too,” she replied. “So much that it saved my life.” He let out a dry chuckle, and turned them to watch the sunset.


End file.
